Sunday, June 28, 2009

Channel Hide Special Report - Celebrity Deaths

This is a Channel Hide Special Report


This past week has taken quite a few celebrities from us, all of which are really no laughing matter. Death in any circumstance is always sad, and for a lot of people around the world, this week was not easy.



Ed McMahon (March 6, 1923 - June 23, 2009)

A lot can be said about TV legend Ed McMahon. From game shows to comedy, McMahon always could be seen with a wide smile. His quick wit landed him alongside funnyman Johnny Carson on NBC's "The Tonight Show" and helped create a longstanding tradition in late night variety shows that is still going strong today.

More importantly, Ed McMahon is a honored veteran of The United States Marine Corps. he garnered multiple decorations as a Marine fighter pilot and later became a flight instructor. He fought in the Korean War, and later retired as a Colonel in 1966, just to enlisted in the California Air National Guard.

Unfortunately, his health declined at the turn of the century, which ultimately resulted with his death this past Tuesday. This American Hero, as well as beloved Television icon, will be greatly missed.

Below is a tribute from Conan O'Brian, current host of "The Tonight Show"




Farrah Fawcett (February 2, 1947 - June 25, 2009)

Farrah Fawcett was one of the most well known women in television during her time starring in "Charlie's Angels" and became widely recognized as the greatest sex symbol of the 1970s. Her famous pin-up poster (pictured above) is actually the highest-selling of all time, and still can be found in dorm rooms across America (I have one, and I was a freshman in college 20 years after it was taken in 1976).

More important than her (obvious) sex appeal, she suffered from several forms of cancer, which were the eventual cause of her death. There was a lot of drama surrounding her attitude toward cancer and its treatment, but she never stopped fighting. After going public with her disease, she felt the need to document her treatments. A television documentary was released about her a month before her passing that was watched by millions and is being re-run on many different networks.

While her family life was often strained, she was still one of "America's Angels" and her talent and beauty will be missed.



Michael Jackson (August 29, 1958 - June 25, 2009)

Love him or hate him, Michael Jackson is one of the most accomplished, beloved, and talented musicians in history, and his death may be one of the most shocking and momentous witnessed in a long time. The wake this man left behind him is so profound in importance that to dismiss his death as "overblown" or "distracting" is downright wrong.

Let me be clear here, I am not going to judge his alleged actions as an adult in this post, but instead look back at what made this man the planetary sensation that he is: his music.

Michael Jackson holds a ton of records. In fact, he has won so many that he set the record for most records and awards won in the history of music.

To name a few:


His album "Thriller" (1982) is the best selling Album in history with and estimated 109 million copies sold to date. It earned this record in just a year and has yet to be beaten. It is also the highest selling US album at 50 million copies, and was the #1 US album in two different years (1983 and 1984), which is also a record. Actually, there are so many records held by this album, that I'm just gonna stop here and bask at the glory that is Thriller. It is truly an amazing album.

The music video to the single "Thriller" was named "The Most Successful Music Video" by Guinness World Records. (you can watch the entire thing if you scroll down a bit). It was created with a $500 Thousand budget and was treated as a major motion picture, even earning a theatrical release!

His music video "Black or White" was watched simultaneously by over 500 Million people worldwide, a record for largest music video audience in history.

The album "Bad" was on the Billboard 200 Top 5 for 38 weeks, more than any other album in history.

"HIStory Tour" - (1996-1997) - Highest Grossing Performance Tour in History, a record he set (and then broke) twice, starting with the "Bad World Tour" (1987-1989) and then "Dangerous World Tour" (1992-1993).

And perhaps the most important record:
Michael Jackson supported 39 Charities in his lifetime, more than any other singer in history. Notable ones include the American Cancer Society, Sickle Cell Research, and Volunteers of America.

You can view these and the rest of the his accomplishments, awards, and records on Wikipedia

Once again, Michael Jackson has had a very storied history outside of the music world, with quite a bit of it negative, but his musical accomplishments eclipse any other musical artist or artists that have ever performed. He single-handedly changed the music business with his style of performance, depth of talent, and widespread appeal. The nickname "King of Pop" is an understatement.






Billy Mays (July 20, 1958 - June 28, 2009)

I really have to say, this one shocked me just as much as Jackson. Billy Mays is a Pittsburgh native and nationally recognized television pitch-man, known for his endorsement of "As seen on TV" products. You all have probably seen his commercials for Oxi-Clean or Orange-Glo over the years.

It's hard not to call Mays likable, as his commercials were the kind of down-to-earth demonstrations that really seemed to define what the modern infomercial is these days. He only endorsed products that he tested himself, and his demonstrations were nothing other than everyday situations, something Americans can easily relate to. He seemed to shout at the camera, which became a recognized trademark of his, which is parodied by many people. He seemed to have a lot of excitement for his work, and even recently starred in a television show on the Discovery Channel called "Pitchmen". The show was a documentary style one that revealed a lot about the infomercial world and how he went about his work.

He was not oblivious to his often comedic mannerisms, a thing he often joked about and even parodied during a series of commercials for ESPN Internet service, "ESPN360". As tiresome as infomercials go, I always seemed to stop and watch Mays while channel surfing just because he was entertaining and the products seemed interesting (although I'll admit some of them were rather ridiculous at times). I personally love Oxi-Clean, which does the job he claims it does with flying colors. Luckily you can find it in stores now, as I am somewhat weary of television sales. While I've never bought anything from an infomercial, I would probably only buy from him if I eventually decided to do so.

He was found dead this morning, a news item that really shocked me when I found out. He was not a rock star or an international celebrity, but a man who made his living in an honest way, and for that I really do have a lot of respect for him. He earned his success and appeal with products he tested and approved of, unlike many others in his business who would instead push forward with crap products in order to make a buck. He was taken too soon, and will be missed.

Astonishingly, Billy appeared on the Tonight Show just this past week, and here is the clip:


Final thoughts:

I recognize that the celebrity world is not always the most glamorous one (despite their attempts), but any death becomes a matter of conversation and sadness, be it for the fans or the person's family. This past week was kind of a rapid-fire session of deaths, and something I believe is worth talking about. While the timing of these deaths is a coincidence, I can't help but think about the shock and sadness any death brings, let alone four well known and loved people.

I wish to express my deepest sympathies to the family, friends, and fans of those we lost this week, and I'm sure the others here at the Channel Hide wish to do the same. Hopefully our next post will allow us to return to our regular dose of comedic nonsense and poorly timed puns. Thanks for staying tuned, and have a great week everyone.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Here's an Interesting Concept... Bacon Flavored Vodka

It's not often that a new product excites me as much as the following:



Yes, I know... your first reaction to such an idea is "Who would even come up with an idea like that?"

My answer: A GENIUS. But please... allow me to elaborate.

Conceptualization:

The company releasing Bakon Vodka explains their product as follows:

"Although today you can find plenty of sweet, fruity-flavored mixtures and infusions, we wanted to set out to do something different, something savory…something bacon. And we set out to do it right, to create a premium-quality vodka you’d enjoy drinking." (Direct Link)

You notice immediately that they don't explain their reasoning for bacon, they just assume that bacon is the reason. What genius marketing. Bacon and Alcohol, not because it was wanted, but because its Bacon with Alcohol. It was as if it was missing and someone finally found it.

Let's face it, Bacon is tasty. Be it a healthy variety or pure fatback, bacon provides a delicious and essential part of the classic American breakfast. Crispy, crunchy, and is usually never high enough in quantity to break one of the deadly sins with.

Fast forward 12 hours. Happy hour has started. People begin drinking. If it's a Friday night, people begin partying. What is missing from this? Well, if your drinks are crunchy, you need to get a different drink, but the concept of that delicious bacon taste is certainly in limited quantities. What better way to infuse the best thing about the morning with the best thing about the evening?

Bakon Vodka is here.

Application:

Bakon Vodka's site lists a number of drink recipes here, and while I don't want to steal their site's thunder, I simply must highlight a few:

1) Bakon Chocolate Martini

This is classic use of concept expansion. What else kicks ass besides bacon and alcohol? Well, Chocolate sounds like a good contender! Looking at the simple recipe, it looks like bacon fans with a sweet tooth and a drinking problem are in for some happy times. The only real problem would be the shaken or stirred question. Decisions, decisions...

The only thing that could expand this further would be holiday mixes. Bakonogg anyone?





2) Bakon Vodka Marinated Steak

I simply can't imagine anyone besides a vegetarian being against this concept. There is already a high demand for steak and bacon concatenation, but allowing steak to be marinated in bacon? What an awesome idea that until now has been virtually unattainable. Sure, we have marinated food in alcohol before, such as beer-battered fish or ground beef with Jack Daniels Brand Barbecue Sauce, but the idea of MARINATING MEAT IN OTHER MEAT is simply too good to be true.






Final Thoughts:

Unfortunately for all of us, Bakon Vodka has not hit shelves yet, and when it does it will not be in very large distribution areas. According to the official site, only the northwest will get to taste it at launch, but I promise you, dear readers, I will find a way to ship it to the City of Champions as soon as I can for an official review. While we wait, we can try to brew up our own!



Hopefully you were not scared away by the man's strange rapist mustache.

In the meantime, I ask that interested readers throw their support behind the fine people at Bakon Vodka and give their site your eyeballs.

http://www.bakonvodka.com/

Hopefully the demand for this product can grow enough for more areas to justify carrying it.



~Jimmy "
Then again... it might taste horrible." the G.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Conan is Really Awesome



Last Monday, the Tonight Show got a much needed change when Conan O'Brien took over for Jay Leno.

Not that I have anything against Jay Leno, but enough already. We get it! Your head bobbles and you have a big chin. I'm tired of a monologue aimed at the 40 and over crowd. The Tonight Show was and will soon be again on the cutting edge of late night. If I had to hear Kevin Eubanks go "ooh Jay" one more time after a corny bad economy joke I would be forced to shove bamboo into my own fingernails.

David Letterman probably looks back at not getting the Tonight Show after Johnny Carson left as the best thing that ever happened to him. Way to go Jay, NBC's in the gutter and it's all your fault... Okay, maybe not all his fault.

I'll move on from Jay bashing to Conan praising.




Late Night was the only reason I even tried to stay up late as a youngster. Conan is weird, awkward, and has better comedic timing then most Hollywood A-listers. No offense to Jimmy Fallon, who is doing a rather good job, but who gives a damn about The Roots. I'll take Max Weinberg everyday of the week.

The obvious sexual tension between Conan, Max, and Labamba is quite honestly one of the best running jokes I've ever witnessed. Not only did Max and the boys come along for the ride, but so did Conan's former and current side kick Andy Richter. Andy Richter is a funny dude. Even his failed TV show "Andy Richter Controls the Universe" was hilarious. Unfortunately he's not on the couch next to the desk anymore, but Andy behind a podium is better than no Andy at all.



June 1, 2009 will be a night I will never forget. I was waiting for the day for nearly 4 years when Jay named Conan as heir to the Tonight Show throne. I got home from work just in time, and I was in constant communication with a friend and fellow Conan lover. It was nothing less than epic. Not only did Conan not disappoint but the fact that Will Ferrell and Pearl Jam were the guests made it even better.

If your not watching the Tonight Show you should be asking yourself "what the hell is wrong with me?" Then after you answer the question you should tune in.

-Rimmel